Integrity...Honestly?

Oswald Chambers says, "My worth to God in public is what I am in private."  Sounds closely related to integrity.  Integrity, by definition, is...the quality of being honest and having strong, moral principles.  Doing the right thing in a reliable way.  I've always liked to define integrity as who you are when everyone's looking and what you do when no one's looking.  Integrity is not about a feeling; it's about rightness.  It's a matter of character.  Are you a person of integrity?  It's a choice.  And today, I had a choice.  Here's the story...my wife Jennifer took our 4 1/2 yr. old Golden Retriever to the vet this morning.  Belle could hardly put any weight on her left foot this morning when she walked.  She apparently played to hard this past weekend with her friend and fellow Golden, Crash.  Belle has a bum shoulder, and it looked like she aggravated it.  So we made the appointment with the vet; and Jennifer took her.  $136.50 later, Belle came home with two medicines to help pain and inflammation and instructions to take it easy for a week or so.  That total was interesting...because not long after my wife had shared with me the cost of the vet visit, I checked our online banking account. The debit transaction was only $36.50.  Something wasn't right, so when I came home for lunch, I asked Jennifer to see the receipt.  She immediately noticed that the debit card transaction had been run for the amount of $36.50, $100 less than the actual bill.  The vet receipt had credited us with payment in full but processed on a small portion of that.  My wife immediately said, "I need to call them and let them know.  That's not right."  My wife was right in her assessment.  Sometimes I hate it when that happens.  Nonetheless, she was.  Honestly?  Part of me didn't want to call.  They made the mistake, and they'll never no it if we don't call.  They'll never miss that $100.  Of course I never said any of this out loud to my wife; but an internal battle was going on inside my head and in my heart. So I picked up the phone and called.  Honestly, I hoped the conversation would go something like this..."Mr. Woods, thank you for calling and letting us know.  We're so sorry for our mistake.  Because of your honesty and integrity, we're not going charge you the remainder of the bill.  Have a nice day." But that's not how it went.  There was no offer of rescinding the $100.  There was no consideration of foregoing payment of the remainder of the bill because I did the right thing.  There was a "hold on a minute" moment, then a request for my payment information - which I reluctantly gave.  Then a simple thank you and goodbye.  

I would like to tell you that I felt great for doing the right thing.  But I didn't feel great.  I hung up wanting my $100 back.  I felt ticked that they didn't offer me some sort of "reward" or expression of appreciation for doing the right thing when I could've done nothing, kept the $100, and kept the information to myself.  It's a good thing I didn't make my decision based on my emotions.  If I had, I wouldn't have done the right thing.  I would've done nothing.  But I took the decades-old advice of Dr, James Dobson found in the title of one of his earliest works, a book entitled "Emotions:  Can You Trust Them?"  The obvious answer...no.  No you can't.  You can't trust your emotions...ever.  What can you trust?  Well, for me, as a Christ-follower, I trust God's Word, the Bible.  It is the reliable source of truth that guides my life.  And in the truth found in 1 Samuel 2:30b, God says this:  "...those who honor Me, I will honor."  And when I choose integrity, I choose to honor God.  And that is how I want to live and be known.  

How about you?  Are you a person of integrity?  Do you practice honesty and moral rightness in public?  In private? When everyone sees and when no one sees?  When its easy and when its difficult?  Honesty is truly the best policy.  And being a person of integrity - that's a choice you'll never regret.  And that's the honest to goodness truth...honestly!           

A Letter to my PTHS Class of '86 Classmates

Pirates Fight for Old Pine Tree High

For your Alma Mater dear

Pirates Fight for Old Pine Tree High

For victory is near

To old Pine Tree we’ll be loyal

Til the sun drops from the sky

Remembering until the end

Pirates fight, never die! 

 

Class of '86 Classmates and Friends:

There’s a quote that I use often by Gary Thomas, author of the books Sacred Marriage and Sacred Parenting, among others.  He says, as it relates to parenting, “…the days are long and the years are short.”  It’s true; but not just in parenting.  It’s true in life.  As I look at all the pictures and read all the posts connected to the 30-year class reunion, I’m overwhelmed with emotion -  joy, sadness, regret, love, and on and on I could go.  I regret that I was unable to attend.  But I cherish the memories and friendship that are connected to these pictures from thirty years ago and now.  I’m amazed at the beautiful transparency and honesty with which posts are shared.  Posts dealing with some of life’s most challenging, difficult, gut-wrenching issues – depression, suicide, pain and loss.  All very real.  All very raw.  I can’t help but think of the memories I have with two most recent classmates that we’ve lost – Steve Brantley and Craig Russell.  I played many years of baseball with and against Steve and Craig both.  Those were special times.  Steve was always bigger than life – literally.  Craig always carried with him an air of confidence – almost cockiness – in all he did.  They will be dearly missed, as well as those from our class, who passed on before them.  Who would’ve guessed that Craig would’ve been here Friday night and then gone a day later?  Who knew that he’d reached a place of helplessness and hopelessness?  Who knew that Friday night would’ve been the very last time for most to talk to him, touch him, hug him, help him?  The truth is that there are times when we all need help.  For different reasons and at different times, we each need help.  We need a friend.  We need each other.  I’m very appreciative of the vulnerability with which many of you, my ’86 PTHS classmates, have shared that vulnerability.  We all have a story.  Our stories are filled with joys and pains, mountains and valleys, ups and downs.  Each story carries with it similarities to other stories and uniqueness as your story.  Each story important and valuable and with a need to be heard.  Because we need to learn from each other.  We’re able to comfort and love and encourage others as their life stories intersect ours.  Those intersections may be frequent or infrequent; regular or thirty years a part.  When they happen; however, is not as important as this:  when they happen, they must be seen as opportunities to be seized.  Life opportunities – divine appointments, if you will – to make a difference in someone’s life who may need a kind word, a pat on the back, a helping hand, a bear hug, a listening ear, or the voice of truth saying, “You’re valuable.  You’re important.  Your life matters and carries inherent significance and meaning.”  All of us, at times, need that; and all of us, at a moment’s notice, need to be ready to give it away.  To do so means we must be vigilant to watch, to listen, to pay attention to those in our path while there’s time to do so.  We only have right now.  Yesterday’s a fleeting memory filled with lost opportunity.  Tomorrow is not promised or guaranteed.  We only have right now.  Craig’s tragic passing (and that of others like him) must serve as a neon flashing sign reminder that this thing called life, at best, is hard and very, very brief.  But it’s worth living.  And if it’s worth living, my fellow classmates, then it’s worth living to the fullest.  Make every second count.  Because your contribution to life, no matter how big or small it seems, may be the difference maker to someone who is watching you – your child, your co-worker, your friend of thirty years or the waitress that messed up your order for the third time.  Somebody needs you.  I need you.  And you need me.  We need each other.  So, take a risk.  Ask the hard questions.  Get your hands dirty.  Live with no regrets. There's no doubt that it’ll be worth it in the end.

Thanks for taking the time to read my ramblings, whether you know me well, remember me vaguely, or have no clue who I am.  I’m a dad of four and a husband of almost 23 years just trying to do life with all that I got.  Blessings, PTHS friends of the class of ‘86.  I won’t miss the next reunion.  Love and prayers to those of you hurting or in need.  If I can help, I’m available.  – John      

Turtles and Fence Posts: A Simple Reminder for All Graduates

Graduates:  "if a turtle is sitting on a fence post, it had to have some help getting there."  That's the one thing I remember from the keynote at my college graduation from ETBU on June 1, 2016. It's still true today. You haven't got to where you are today without the significance of others in your life:  parents, pastors, teachers, friends, grandparents, coaches, siblings, counselors, and on and on it could go. You get the point. No man is an island. We all need help; and if you're graduating, you've had lots of it. Some you asked for. Some you didn't. Some you wanted. Some, not so much. Practical. Spiritual. Educational. Familial. Serious. Silly. Help of all kind.  It's has been extended to you to get you where you are today and to propel and catapult you into the glorious unknown of the future.  Help. You can take it or leave it. You can buy into it or sell it. The choice is yours. And the future is before you. Don't forget one important piece of timeless truth to live by on this topic of help from God's Word in Hebrews 13:7:

Remember those who led you; who spoke the Word of God to you. And considering the result of their conduct, imitate their faith.

In simple terms:  remember those who made a difference in your life - who went the extra mile on your behalf. Be grateful. Follow their example, especially those who don't just talk a good talk; but they walk a good walk. Be an imitator.

Be imitators of Christ...Eph. 5:1
Walk in a manner worthy...Eph. 4:1

God bless you graduates. And remember:  the turtle reached new heights with the help of others that he would've never reached on his own. You can do the same.

John

The Art of Spiritual Pretense...and How To Fix It

This past Sunday Tom Cottar, our Contemporary Worship Pastor, said during worship  that Church is a great place to pretend.  I agree. God used that statement to stir these thoughts on me.

Church is a great place to pretend...

- that I'm spiritual.
- that I've got it all together.
- that I don't need any help.
- that I can handle life's stuff on my own.
- that I'm ok.
- that I'm not the problem
- that everyone else is the problem.
- that I don't have any problems.
- that I'm not broken.
- that I don't need God.

Church should be a place where I can be real with God and acknowledge that...

- I'm a spiritual mess.
- I don't have it all together.
- I need help.
- I can't handle life's stuff on my own.
- I'm not ok.
- I'm the problem.
- Everyone else is not the problem.
- I have a number of problems.
- I am broken.
- I need God. I need Him a lot.
- And that He is ENOUGH for me, my brokenness, my helplessness, my insufficiency, my problems, my inadequacies, and my spiritual mess.

His Word says... "cast all your cares upon Him, because He cares for you." - 1 Peter 5:7
"My grace is sufficient for you..."

Thank you Lord. I don't have to pretend with you. You know me - the real me- better than I know myself; and I'm a spiritual pretender at times.  Thank You for loving me anyway...just the way that I am.

John

A Day in the Life of a 10th Grader

So on the agenda for my handsome, smart Sophomore son today, starting last night...
7 pm - arrived home from school and after school band practice
Get started on homework...then dinner...then more homework (AP Chemistry lab due tomorrow; prep for Chemistry Quiz tomorrow; prep for Spanish 2 test tomorrow; prep for English vocabulary test tomorrow; one page essay over current events article for English article of the week; watch video & take notes for World History). I'm tired just thinking about all that.
About 11 pm took shower, continued homework, bed about midnight.
Up at about 6:15 to be at school for band by 7:15 this morning. Get dressed. Quick devo.  Quick breakfast. Out the door. 3 tests at school today, jazz band tryouts, other "normal" class responsibilities, band hall at 5:30 tonight for home football game, home about 11 - maybe. And he'll be writing that one page article of the week for 9th period Pre-AP English today after he inhales his lunch because he was too worn out to finish it last night at midnight when he went to bed.
I know many parents of HS students reading this post can concur with a similar schedule for their student.  My son is strong & smart, but he's not Superman. Band is an extracurricular choice. I get that. Everything else mentioned is school required. Is there a way to tell my son's Pre-AP and AP teachers that giving him a greater workload in each class each day doesn't make him smarter?  Four hours of homework a week just in English doesn't make him better or smarter in English. It just makes him busier. Creates more stress. Keeps him up later. Wears him down faster. Those classes should be harder, and they are. That's a given. I've got no problem with that. Just doesn't mean the amount of homework should be exorbitant just because the work is hard or harder. I love and respect teachers and educators and all they do to help educate, train, and equip our students to be prepared for  life to come. Most are overworked & underpaid and under appreciated. Thanks for your sacrifices and for going the extra mile for my children. But there are some who still need a reality check:  Four hours of homework or more a week in one subject - unrealistic. 15-20 hours a week at school for one extra curricular activity - unrealistic. I could go on and on and on. But I won't; except to say - My son shouldn't be at school longer every day than he is at home each day. He shouldn't be at school longer in a day every day than I am at work. But most days, he is.  Find your peripheral vision please.  Dont just see with tunnel vision.  Yours is not the only class or activity my son is in. His life doesn't revolve around your class or event or activity. Help me out here and see the bigger picture.
And the truth is, I'm concerned for my son.  He does have a life aside from Chemistry and Algebra and English and History and band.  I want him to enjoy it. I don't want him to crater from the weight of the load. Let's work together as teachers & parents. More work doesn't equal more productive students. Busier so as to keep out of trouble doesn't equal better or trouble-free lives.  That's potentially a double-edged sword. Parents can (and should) have their kids involved in less things -  no doubt. But that's not what I'm talking about. Last time I checked - reading, writing, and 'rithmatic are not optional. Band - optional. Football, cheer - optional. Choir, drill team, volleyball - optional. Science - required. Math, LA, History - required. Homework, labs, AR, tests, etc. etc. - required. We've all got to do our part. Parents. Teachers. Coaches. Counselors. Administrators.
My son is on your watch. Volume of work doesn't equal victory or success in life for him. I'll manage and help guide his involvement in extracurricular activities and help balance that with his required work at school. But teachers - can you help keep the volume of required work reasonable?  Yours is not the only class my son is in. Can you work with us?  Can you be more flexible?  Challenge him in class. Stretch him to be the best he can be. I want that, and he needs that. Thank you for doing that.  But don't break him please.  Don't think you've got to give him more work for him to earn the right to be in your class. He doesn't. He's already earned the right to be there.  And he's the only Sophomore I got. And he's pretty smart and pretty special and pretty strong. But he's not Superman.  He's a 15-year old Sophomore.  And he's mine. And his mom and I are pretty fond of him. And when I don't think you're being fair or reasonable where he's concerned, you'll be hearing from me and/or seeing me. And when you do, don't take it personal. I'm called to be his advocate and fight for him - and I will. And I'll be fair and professional. And I'll listen. And when he's wrong or needs correcting or redirected, I'll do it. But when you're unreasonable or unrealistic or wrong, I hope you'll be willing to adjust also. I will when it's the case for me. Let's work together. There's too much at stake not to. Thanks. - John (Parent In Progress)

We Said Yes - The Power of One Decision

The day was April 20, 2004.  The Woods' nest was empty.  The cubbard was bare.  There was only my wife and me.  Hurting.  Helpless.  Hoping.  Praying.  Half a year short of 10 years of marriage.  The twins were in heaven.  Discouragement reigned.  But hope was not lost.  God was working.  We were foster adopt trained and equipped; and ready to have our home filled with children.  The phone rang.  On the other end was a message; but not the message we were expecting.  A child was available; but not a foster to adopt child.  An emergency placement, temporary in nature, was needed.  We had a choice.  We didn't really want children in our home who would potentially be leaving in a day or a week or month or a year.  We wanted children to come to our home to live, to stay, to be ours, forever.  But the message regarding this child, Selena Ann Salazar, wasn't that.  She needed a place to stay for an indefinite and undetermined amount of time.  We had a choice.  No guarantee, just a choice.  A choice to say, "Yes, we'll take her" or "No, not at this time - you'll have to find another place."  Four months earlier, God had brought me to a place of healing from a wound that had left four year old scars.
Four years prior in March 2000, we had a little girl enter our home to live.  Kelly was her name.  Three months shy of four years old, her mother had just died of cancer.  Her aunt knew she needed a home; and she knew of our desire to have children.  So we took her in to our home.  No paperwork.  No training.  Just a home filled with love looking for a child to give it to.  And we gave it to Kelly...for three months.  Then she was gone.  In God's providence and wisdom, He took her from our home and allowed her to go back to a less than favorable situation.  But that's another story for another post.
This story is about the power of one decision.  Four months earlier from the day of that monumental phone call, God had brought me to a place of healing.  A place of surrender.  A place where I had to let go of the hurt and pain.  Pain wrought out of loss.  Loss of Kelly.  Loss of Jonathan and Jenny, our beloved twins who left this earth in August 2002.  Loss of any other chance to have biological children.  I never wanted children again in my home that I had to risk losing at any level for circumstances out of my control.  But that December 2003 day, God rocked my world.  He said (my summary), "John, you don't have the right to say no when I give you the opportunity to provide love and care and hope and help meet the needs of a child or children, whether that's for one day, one week, one month, or a year or longer.  Those children, the least of these, are My children; and they face greater risk than you've ever had to face.  You can't let pain from the past keep you from providing life-changing love, My love, to a child that I choose to bring into your home."  After that December encounter with God, wrought out of time spent that morning reading Psalm 37, I literally held up my hands in surrender and said,  "God, whatever You want and whatever You ask from me, I'll obey.  I'll do it.  Considering the risk You took for me so that I could be Your child, I will take the risk of showing any child Your love that You allow to come into my home for whatever period of time.  My call is to be faithful to answer Your call; and if You call me to take a risk for a child, temporarily or with permanence, I will do it."  I took my wife to lunch and told her I was ready to pursue foster/adpot training.  We did; and we received the phone call on that April 20, 2004.  And we said YES.  Eleven years ago today, we said YES. We had no guarantee of any timetable that Selena Ann Salazar would be with us.  All we knew was that a place of refuge was needed for this little three month old, ten pound girl; and we had a home to provide for her.  And so we said, YES.  Our lives would never be the same.   
The next day, April 21, 2004, we headed one hour west of Breckenridge to Abilene to pick up little Selena.  And we picked her up as an emergency placement; but God already knew that she was a permanent placement, forever chosen before the beginning of time by her Creator, to be a part of the Woods' family.  And on that same day, April 21, 2004, when we picked up little Selena, we also found out that we had been chosen to be the parents of Brandon and Bradley, who were already adoptable.  So Selena came to live with us on April 21, 2004, and six weeks later Brandon and Bradley would come to live with us.   
And so on that Spring day eleven years ago today, my wife and I had a decision to make.  It would be a life-changing decision.  A decision that would change our family dynamic.  And more importantly, a decision that would change the family tree for Selena Ann Salazar (now Brenna Michelle Woods).  One decision.  A decision carrying with it innumerable blessings - a decision that would reap salvation on so many levels.  Salvation for Brenna from a lifestyle and life cycle and history of prostitution, drugs, and separation from God.  And salvation for Brenna through a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.  Salvation made possible because of a decision made eleven years and a day ago to say YES.  Yes to God.  Yes to Life.  Yes to Brenna.  And yes to freedom from the cycle of death, devestation and darkness.
Thank you, my heavenly Father, for your wisdom and guidance to help us make the right decision.  Thank you for the life you've given Brenna and the joy that she is and that she brings to our family.  And thank you for the healing you brought to my life and heart from the pain of devestating loss so that I'd be open to Your leading on April 20, 2004 to say Yes to Your plan for my family.  Give others courage, I pray, to be willing to trust You and take a risk to do what is right and best; even when it doesn't make sense.  Thank you for being faithful.  Thank you for your salvation.  Thank you for being My forever Father.  I love you.  - John            

An Update from the Woods: 2014 in Review

 Dear Family and Friends:                                                            December 27, 2014

Woods' Family Highlights of 2014

- John & Jennifer celebrated 20 yr. anniversary on Dec. 17 with a Steven Curtis Chapman Christmas concert & a trip to San Antonio for the Broadway production of The Lion King.  

- Having Joseph & Francisca Akakpo, native missionaries & friends from Togo, West Africa stay in our home (August) & share about their ministry with our FBC church family. 

- Brenna's first piano recital on Dec. 7. 

- Bradley became a teenager (6/26) Brenna went to double-digits (1/21).

- Bethany's profession of faith (7/13); Brenna's baptism (1/12). 

- Refinanced home; purchased new used Yukon XL (in full) :). 

- Maggie, our Chihuahua, turned 16 yrs. old on Dec. 23. 

- Celebrated 10 yr. anniversary of Brandon & Bradley's adoption (10/8), Brenna's Gotcha Day (4/21) and 7 yr. anniversary for Bethany's adoption (11/27).

- Helped facilitate the sell of my dad's house in Marshall.  

Brandon 

- Turned 14 on January 25

- Mission Trip team member with Revolution Student Ministry in June to Litteton, CO. 

- TMEA all-district band member on trumpet as a Freshman & earned letter jacket. 

- Stood alone on his campus at Hutto HS on September 25 for See You at the Pole, the global day of prayer for students. 

- Meritorious Award recipient in Awana

Bradley 

- Celebrated 13th BD (June 26) with a Journey to Manhood Weekend

- Weekend included dinner at Shogun's with some godly men, father/son getaway to Dallas, Medieval Times show, and tour of At&T Stadium. 

- Mission Trip team member with Revolution Student Ministry in June to Litteton, CO. 

- 1st chair Alto-Saxaphone at Farley MS Wind Ensemble. 

- Milestone Award recipient in Awana 

- Farley MS football team member, playing WR & String Safety. 

Brenna 

- Followed Christ in believers' baptism on January 12 at FBC Pflugerville. 

- Recipient of Excellence Award in Awana

- turned 10 yrs. old on January 21 & celebrated with a sleepover, family party, & an annual daddy/daughter trip to Build-A-Bear!  

- Began taking piano lessons in September and doing great!

- LIT (Leader In Training) PreTeen Mission: Ft. Worth mission trip team member in June, sharing Christ & ministering to children & families in FW.

- Enjoyed her 9th season playing soccer, scoring half of her teams' goals in the Fall. 

- 5th Grader at Nadine Johnson Elementary School.

Bethany

- Turned 9 yrs. old on August 11 & celebrated with her annual Build-A-Bear trip with dad along with a family party. 

- Trusted Jesus Christ as her personal Savior & Lord on July 13 at home. 

- Earned Sparky Award in Awana. 

- Continues to excel in gymnastics; loves music & dance. 

- 3rd Grader at Nadine Johnson Elementary School in Hutto. 

What We Do

- serve at FBC Pflugerville; John - Children's Pastor; Jennifer - Wee Ones Preschool Music Teacher

- parents at Casa de Woods

- Facilitate care for my dad, John H. Woods

What We Enjoy

- Family Devotions, Movie Nights, Family BD parties, reruns of Full House & Cosby Show 

- Our Golden Retriever Belle (2 yrs. old in June). 

- Annual traditions like:  Preteen Camp (July), VBS (June), Mission trips (June), summer vacation, daddy/daughter date night (October) and dance (February), Spring Break (March), summer, & Christmas trips to MawMaw & PawPaw's house in Longview. 

- You can keep up with the happenings of the Woods' family on 

Facebook (John & Jennifer), Instagram (jawoods68), Twitter (@jawoods68), and at http://daddyof4bmws.blogspot.com 

Remember:  When the time came to completion, God sent His Son, born of a woman, born under the law, to redeem those under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons. (Galatians 4:4, 5 HCSB)

Hope you & your family had a very Merry Christmas and wishing you God's best & blessings for a Happy New Year in 2015. 

John, Jennifer, Brandon, Bradley, Brenna, and Bethany Woods